If only Asos had loyalty reward schemes

I got paid! So I bought shit! I know, I know, you’re all very surprised that I’m putting up yet another “look at my outrageous spending habit” post.

Now that you’ve recovered from the shock, here’s some of my favourite latest purchases (not all from Asos!).


Goddess Kayla Bra – £36

Because I work more hours this year, my paycheques have all gone up a little! This means I’ve been profligately flinging money towards my own tits and buying ALL THE BRAS. I fucking love bras, you have no idea. Normally, I can only afford cheap, flimsy bras that like to stab me repeatedly before I throw them away in resentment. Not now! Now I can get proper fucking brands in colours that aren’t white or black! And this Goddess bra is really comfortable, gives me a nice shape and so far (I think I’ve had it 2 or 3 months now?) it’s holding up really well!

bratime2Elomi Bijou Bra – £48

Ok, even with my BUMPER PAYCHEQUE this was verging on the realm of painfully expensive (which I guess telegraphs to you all just where my budget for clothes actually is [i.e. lower than I’d like]). But it is so fucking pretty, and I fucking adore the shape it gives me. I can’t stop swearing about it! However, I only got it recently, so I can’t answer to how well it’ll hold up to wear and washing (by hand, obvs). I am hoping that it’ll last me a good while!

And although I bought like, 5 other bras, I’ll stop yapping on about them. I think I am the only one who is interested in the various bits of scaffolding used to hoist my frontal acreage to best advantage.


So apparently these beautiful gold high tops aren’t on the Asos website anymore! But they were about £30 I think? They’re so comfortable and so gorgeous!


Sequin shoes – £25

Just look at these. So beautiful. So impractical. They itch like mad without socks on, and because I have wide as hell feet, I had to get these in a size 10, which means they are ridiculously long on me. I am essentially waddling around in slightly uncomfortable, bedazzled canoes.

It’s fucking awesome.


Cross back vest – Out of stock, but it was £6.99

I bought a shit ton of basics and I haven’t included most of them, because basics are boring, but this vest is so comfortable and nicely flattering. It’s great to wear at night for sleeping in, but it’s well enough shaped to work as a regular top, so I’m really pleased with it! Much nicer than vests which always roll up or just lose all shape the second you put them on.


Striped bardot top – Out of stock, but I bought it for £11 (or £16, idr)

It’s taken me a while to warm up to the bardot trend, but I got this on a whim and I really, really love it! It is a very flattering cut and the kind of clingy that’s a little sexy rather than uncomfortable and awkward. In fact, I liked it so much I bought the plain black version (also on sale!).


Skater dress with high neck and lace – £30

I’m trying to cut down on fancy dresses! I don’t have lots of places to wear them and I’m sick of having clothes sitting and languishing in my wardrobe (rather than rocking on my hot bod). But I just couldn’t resist this lovely dress! I kind of feel like a swamp witch going to a fancy witch luncheon social when I wear it.


Tunic with mesh sleeve – £14

I really like this top, it’s floaty and comfortable and I am all for mesh inserts! It definitely isn’t a tunic though – it doesn’t even cover my butt, which is what I think a tunic should do. Otherwise, oversized and lovely!


Mesh side leggings – £12.50

I may have just bought these to match the above top… I definitely did do that, and I regret nothing!

And finally!


Silver snake-skin high tops – £40

Now my feet shall RIDE ETERNAL, SHINY AND CHROME TO THE GATES OF WALHALLA. And nothing else matters.

Did y’all buy anything great lately? Do you also use mindless consumerism to hide the lack of true meaning in your life?


2 thoughts on “If only Asos had loyalty reward schemes

  1. That green dress… I would love to find something like that! “I kind of feel like a swamp witch going to a fancy witch luncheon social” that made me laugh out loud because it was almost exactly what I thought when I saw the dress. I was thinking earth witch or something of the sort. Though, I really don’t go anywhere that needs fancy dresses that often either. The striped bardot top is really adorable. I love stripes for some reason. Fancy bras are something I’d love to buy more often but sizes are never available in the designs I like in regular stores, so I guess I’ll have to go online.

    • The green dress really is pretty, and it’s not so over fancy that you couldn’t wear it out and about. It’s quite a thick material though, so I’m waiting till Autumn to swish about in it’s Earthy witchy loveliness!
      Fancy bras are like my crack, I always want more, more, more of them! I tend to buy mine online – Evans is the only shop I can find irl to buy bras, but they’re not a great quality and always end up spearing me! Luckily, with the slightly more expensive brands, the sizing seems consistent so it was safer to buy online once I knew I wasn’t going to receive bras that said they were the same size but were in fact totally different! It’s nerve wracking to take the plunge though – so much money, potentially wasted!

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